I could use some advice here. My next door neighbors have a dog that's not abused but certainly neglected. She never leaves the backyard, never has any companionship, is a little skinny but far from malnourished. Last night we had a hell of a monsoon and it blew their gate open. This morning around 6 I was picking up debris from the yard & she comes walking down the street after a night roaming the neighborhood in the rain. It's only the second time in 4 years she's been out, the last being a year ago when the same scenario happened. She's a loveable beast and I want to keep her. The owners don't care about her & both are at work, they own a restaurant. They left with the gate wide open and their dog missing! She's filthy, and in spite of temps reaching well over 110 the last few weeks, as long as a dog has shade & water it's perfectly legal to keep them outside 24/7. Wrong, but legal. They aren't breaking any laws but morally I feel an obligation to take over. I also really like her! Do I go the nice route & ask to keep her, play tough & see if in fact they are violating any cruelty laws, or lay down and hand her back when they get home? She deserves better. I lost my best friend over ten hears ago, still dream of him once in awhile, and being single I should could use the companionship. My dogs are family, I'd give a great home to her for the rest of her life.
A moral dilemma
- Thread starter CigarSmoka
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Oh man, that's tough. She clearly looks too thin. Are you on good speaking terms with the neighbor? Do they have kids?
people treat their animals differently. We always kept our dog outside growing up but I know a lot of millennials keep their dogs in the house, even if its a large working dog.
I would just keep the dog and love on it until the owner shows up.... If they ever do.
I would just keep the dog and love on it until the owner shows up.... If they ever do.
Unfortunately, you are legally obligated to give back the dog because it is their property by law. That said, it seems that your neighbors don't care for or like the dog very much and that you would be a better owner. I would go the nice route unless you can prove that they are bad owners. Ask them if you can purchase the dog from them, explaining that you would like the companionship. Perhaps the dog is a burden on them and they would welcome a new owner. I think its the best you can do.
tough call, I agree totally with the above post. good luck that dog deserves you!
Taking someone's dog and probably even asking them if you can have her will most likely lead to serious animosity between you and them. It's up to you to decide if the welfare of the dog or if her quality of life will be significantly better, will outweigh the oncoming negativity between you and the dog's owners.
I agree here, asking if you can purchase the dog because you want the companionship keeps any blame off the neighbors. When people are accused of being bad (owners, people, etc) they usually get defensive. On the other hand, if they feel that you want the dog and they are doing you a favor, it makes them feel good about getting rid of the dog- even if its just the excuse they needed. It's a psychological thing. As soon as you point out their faults it's probably going to go sour and you'll get nowhere.
You may also point out that if they ever wanted to visit the dog will be right next door. It prevents them from having to "let go" of the dog, while still being able to let go of the responsibility of having one.
+1 ... the law says that the dog belongs to them.
However, you should make the attempt to adopt her. Talk to your neighbors and see how they feel about it. Don't use phrases like "She is abused, neglected and malnourished since you've had her." Just talk to them and see if they might like to give you custody. Maybe even offer a small token cash payment.
Your neighbors may be as concerned about the dog's welfare as much as you are. They might be anxious to get rid of her, but hesitate to take her to the pound.
You'll never know unless you make the attempt and talk to them about it. Just don't come across as hostile and arrogant about the way they have been caring for her. Treat the situation in a way that will put the dog's welfare as everyone's primary concern.
It's not your dog. Taking it is wrong. If the dog is abused, the authorities are empowered to take it, not a concerned and loving citizen. Talk to your neighbors, without offending, let them know that you noticed the dog spends a lot of time alone, and how hard they must work . . . .
You may wind up with your wish, or you may wind up knowing your neighbors a whole lot better, or both. Good luck!
You may wind up with your wish, or you may wind up knowing your neighbors a whole lot better, or both. Good luck!
- Thread starter
- #10
The guy is very nice, his wife not so much. Can't even get a "Hello" out of her. If she smiled her face would probably crack.
My dog was a house dog - 155lb Great Dane. But I understand others keeping them outside is their right, and none of my business. However, temps here approach 120 degrees in the summer...
I wouldn't just take it, I have no right to, and stealing is stealing regardless of one's moral beliefs.
That being said, the guy just came home for a break, their restaurant is only 10 minutes away tops. I had a friendly conversation with him. He found the dog in the desert 8 years ago, her brother was dead, some jerk dumped them & left them to die a horrible death. He thanked me and alluded to his wife being the reason the dog is outdoors only, no surprise there. I feel I did the dog justice by giving her water, breakfast, and a cool place to stay until somebody got home. She seemed happy to see him, last time not so much when the wife got home. Thanks for the advice everyone, I would've offered to buy her if the conversation didn't go well. I'll be happy to take her for walks though, at least she'll get out a bit. I'm thinking it's time for me to get another Great Dane, they're my breed. I gave my gf the boot a few months ago, a few years longer than I should've waited. I could use the companionship, and although there will never be another like him, there could be another just as great, only different.
Thanks again.
This is exact same advice I would offer.
Something my inlaws did was casually half adopted their neighbors dog. It became a two household family member. It worked out well for them because when they were gone, the other side had the dog and vice versa. Getting another companion is a great idea and one where this beautiful soul could have a friend too.
Here's the advice to give the neighbor about his wife: tell him to lock both the dog and his wife in the trunk of his car for about an hour or so. After the hour is up, open the trunk. The one who's still happy to see him gets to stay; the one who complains gets the boot.
Dogs are usually great all the way around. I've rarely met what I would call a bad dog. Like God said when he created dogs: "Oh, these turned out great. I'm going to want all of these back at some point."
https://www.buzzfeed.com/gracespelman/tweets-about-god-creating-stuff
Dogs are usually great all the way around. I've rarely met what I would call a bad dog. Like God said when he created dogs: "Oh, these turned out great. I'm going to want all of these back at some point."
https://www.buzzfeed.com/gracespelman/tweets-about-god-creating-stuff
"I know you guys have your hands full running the restaurant, I'd be more than happy to take her for walks evey once in a while, or let her cool off at my house on really hot days"
Something like that would probably be ok to say, depending on how the conversation goes it could lead to the topic of adoption
Something like that would probably be ok to say, depending on how the conversation goes it could lead to the topic of adoption
rotfl!
+1,when i was growing up we kept our hunting dogs tied to their houses,because if left to themselves they would run off hunting.they received care and attention twice a day minimum,most of the time more.we also hunted almost nightly during the spring thru fall.if the dog is being neglected then you have a moral obligation to step up.check with your local shelter/animal control for the specific regulations in your area.dogs need daily affection as do children.they are a pack animal after all.
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+1 here.. I think SlyMoose has a good approach. Especially if you're retired and they know you have a lot of time on your hands.. they might feel like they're adopting you to take care of as well and everyone knows how "pets" like company
.Probably wouldn't hurt to spend some time and money in their restaurant.. but don't turn them in if you get food poisoning
...
Just an idea. Get your Dane and introduce the two. That way it gives you a reason/excuse to set play dates. More importantly you can continue to observe the other dog and make sure it is not being abused.
My pup is the only family member to meet me at the door. Even my 9 year old has stopped running to the door to greet the old man.
My pup is the only family member to meet me at the door. Even my 9 year old has stopped running to the door to greet the old man.
Tell them that you found their dog this morning after he/she got out and that you cleaned him up and spend the day enjoying his/her company while they were away. Let them know how close you were to your last dog and that spending time with their dog brought back a lot of great memories. Let them know that you've been thinking how much you'd love to get a dog again and that you like this one so well that if they'd be willing to part with this guy you'd gladly pay them for him. Tell them how great it would be for you and that you're treat him/her really well.
They may feel guilty about being gone all the time and regret the decision to get a dog at this point in their lives. So they may jump at the chance to give him a new home. He may be outside because he needs some more training or maybe he ate the couch and they can't trust him when they are away. My friends dog loved to be around people and I guess she got upset when he wasn't because she tore things up when she was left alone. Maybe this is why it's outside.
If they say no thanks then let them know that you appreciate them considering it and they know where to find you if they change their minds. Other than politely offering you can't really do much more.
Like others have said, say nothing negative at all or the conversation and the relationship with your neighbors will go bad very fast.
They may feel guilty about being gone all the time and regret the decision to get a dog at this point in their lives. So they may jump at the chance to give him a new home. He may be outside because he needs some more training or maybe he ate the couch and they can't trust him when they are away. My friends dog loved to be around people and I guess she got upset when he wasn't because she tore things up when she was left alone. Maybe this is why it's outside.
If they say no thanks then let them know that you appreciate them considering it and they know where to find you if they change their minds. Other than politely offering you can't really do much more.
Like others have said, say nothing negative at all or the conversation and the relationship with your neighbors will go bad very fast.
