So this here is a 100% true story, which is rare for me. Here goes....blame my twin brother @Messygoon if you want, I was just bein' me, and he asked for this true story. I strongly encourage you to stop reading now if'n yer a sissy.
Probably, Oh, 13 years ago or so my lovely bride, who was homeskoolin' my only begotten, belonged to a co-op teaching thing, and we had a "Field Trip" to a Maple Sugar Tree Farm. There was an old picture there, over 100 years old of the original shack, and the owner took me out to see the tree in the old photo. That tree really hadn't grown that much, to be honest. All my sugar maple trees grow like weeds; this had to be what old timers around here call a Rock Maple.
Anyway, that ain't got nothing to do with anything. After you have stood around in the woods on a typical cold, damp, overcast day in Michigan's Thumb region, you are ready to go about 20 minutes after you get there.
So we drive (my wife did. I get lost on my way to the bathroom) into the nearest town to eat lunch. It was a little town, like EVERY town in the Thumb. It had one restaurant, a Pizzaria. And it smelled delicious, and it was busy.
So we go in, probably 50 people, or roughly the size of the towns population. And it's mostly to go folks, lunch time crowd I guess. And we all start grabbing seats while the women go stand in line to order pizza.
And then this one table with three clean looking people sitting at it gets up and leaves. AND THEY LEAVE three slices of pizza on the metal tray on a stand in the middle of the table! Just leave it there!
Well, y'all know I'm about 1/2 Scotch (and yes, the other half soda) so I'm not about to leave that pizza alone.
Here's the part that the War Department says is "gross"..... and a bad example for impressionable young minds. I'd been watching these clean looking people for about 5 minutes. In all that time, not one of them coughed, sneezed, or picked their teeth OR their nose.
So I grabbed a piece of the leftover pizza and commenced to eatin' it. And my bride commenced to tellin' me (loudly) how it was a bad example, and gross, etc, ad nauseam.
The boys all laughed as I recall, the girls all made gagging noises, and none of the Dad's or anyone else fought me for the pizza. I got it all, it was delicious, and it didn't kill me.
I still contend that I did nothing wrong. May have even helped save the planet. What say you all?
Have any of YOU gentlemen ever been falsely accused of being "gross?"
Probably, Oh, 13 years ago or so my lovely bride, who was homeskoolin' my only begotten, belonged to a co-op teaching thing, and we had a "Field Trip" to a Maple Sugar Tree Farm. There was an old picture there, over 100 years old of the original shack, and the owner took me out to see the tree in the old photo. That tree really hadn't grown that much, to be honest. All my sugar maple trees grow like weeds; this had to be what old timers around here call a Rock Maple.
Anyway, that ain't got nothing to do with anything. After you have stood around in the woods on a typical cold, damp, overcast day in Michigan's Thumb region, you are ready to go about 20 minutes after you get there.
So we drive (my wife did. I get lost on my way to the bathroom) into the nearest town to eat lunch. It was a little town, like EVERY town in the Thumb. It had one restaurant, a Pizzaria. And it smelled delicious, and it was busy.
So we go in, probably 50 people, or roughly the size of the towns population. And it's mostly to go folks, lunch time crowd I guess. And we all start grabbing seats while the women go stand in line to order pizza.
And then this one table with three clean looking people sitting at it gets up and leaves. AND THEY LEAVE three slices of pizza on the metal tray on a stand in the middle of the table! Just leave it there!
Well, y'all know I'm about 1/2 Scotch (and yes, the other half soda) so I'm not about to leave that pizza alone.
Here's the part that the War Department says is "gross"..... and a bad example for impressionable young minds. I'd been watching these clean looking people for about 5 minutes. In all that time, not one of them coughed, sneezed, or picked their teeth OR their nose.
So I grabbed a piece of the leftover pizza and commenced to eatin' it. And my bride commenced to tellin' me (loudly) how it was a bad example, and gross, etc, ad nauseam.
The boys all laughed as I recall, the girls all made gagging noises, and none of the Dad's or anyone else fought me for the pizza. I got it all, it was delicious, and it didn't kill me.
I still contend that I did nothing wrong. May have even helped save the planet. What say you all?
Have any of YOU gentlemen ever been falsely accused of being "gross?"