As far as restaurants go, I quit caring about the location of my hat when people started bringing their crying infants and uncontrollable toddlers to grown up establishments at 9:00 PM. If I take it off it's usually to swat one of them, in a gentlemanly fashion of course.
What happened to taking your hat off inside?
- Thread starter Eeyore
- Start date
I only wear baseball hats and I wear it indoors quite often. My hair doesn't look good after wearing a hat so I'm really doing everybody a favor by keeping it on. I am mindful of where I go when I'm wearing it. I am definitely more relaxed than many about hats.
The Scottish national shrine is both architecturally and emotionally impressive. I visited it on a hot sunny day. I had spent the previous 2 hours looking around the rest of that fascinating castle. I was wearing a sunhat and was in the war memorial mesmerized by the bronze friezes. After about 15 minutes I realised I had not taken my hat off. I then took it off.
I am glad a took it off, and hope there were no 'gentlemen' there distracted enough to judge me or what my emotions were. The building and its significance overwhelmed me. I honestly don't remember how anyone else was dressed. But I remember the atmosphere to be solemn and dignified.
I am glad a took it off, and hope there were no 'gentlemen' there distracted enough to judge me or what my emotions were. The building and its significance overwhelmed me. I honestly don't remember how anyone else was dressed. But I remember the atmosphere to be solemn and dignified.
Society has mostly moved past the "follow these random rules for no particular reason other than I told you so" model, and I'm not particularly saddened by that.
Like Doc I believe it depends on the location. For example if I go into the local hardware store or liquor store the hat stays on but if it's a museum, gallery, etc the hat comes off. I go into someones house/apartment and it comes off unless or we're moving in or out.
I flew across the country this christmas and the hat stayed on in the airports until I sat down at my gate, it also comes off any place I sit down to eat. When I landed in Alberta mom picked me up and we stopped by a Tim Hortons to grab something to eat and we ate inside and my hat came off once we got to the table but if we'd just gone in and picked it up to eat on the drive home my hat would have stayed on.
I flew across the country this christmas and the hat stayed on in the airports until I sat down at my gate, it also comes off any place I sit down to eat. When I landed in Alberta mom picked me up and we stopped by a Tim Hortons to grab something to eat and we ate inside and my hat came off once we got to the table but if we'd just gone in and picked it up to eat on the drive home my hat would have stayed on.
Last edited:
I'm more inclined to follow Doc's notes on this. Especially because often in public place our hands end up being full (or at least mine do). So keeping the hat on my head is the only way to keep up with the other items that are needed. Going into a fast food restaurant/grocery, etc the hat will also stay on. I don't trust anywhere in a FF place to be clean enough to put my hat. And in the grocery type of store, I'm needing my hands to shop with.
Now, I will NEVER wear a hat in a church or in an office. On the weekends and in the evenings, I will typically wear a ball cap (sorry folks, I'm a sports fan) out due to covering the heat sink that has developed on the back of my head. I just try to think of where I'm going, and will not carry it if the end location is not appropriate. I'm working to find a "nice" hat for these occassions to keep the sun off my heat sink/face. I have a western hat that I like, but SWMBO has it stored away. I don't think she trusts my judgement. I'm looking to get a Tilley hat.
Now, I will NEVER wear a hat in a church or in an office. On the weekends and in the evenings, I will typically wear a ball cap (sorry folks, I'm a sports fan) out due to covering the heat sink that has developed on the back of my head. I just try to think of where I'm going, and will not carry it if the end location is not appropriate. I'm working to find a "nice" hat for these occassions to keep the sun off my heat sink/face. I have a western hat that I like, but SWMBO has it stored away. I don't think she trusts my judgement. I'm looking to get a Tilley hat.
I believe that times have changed and hats have become more like a normal part of clothing in today's culture. In the past, hats were fedoras and like rather than ball caps, etc. Similarly most men wore suits and ties to work now that's more of a rarity. So to simply hang onto the old values and assume that everyone wearing a hat indoors is rude or has no manners is not applicable in my opinion. I think wearing a hat or not now is more based upon the situation and whether or not it would be respectful or not to wear one. During the National Anthem, in a nice restaurant, at a funeral, etc. -- definitely no hat. But just because you're indoors (say at a mall, or wandering around museums, etc.) doesn't mean you need to take off your hat anymore in today's culture. I was a college professor for years and at least 50% of my male students wore hats in my class. They were great kids with good manners, etc. but they wore hats -- because men of that age wear hats as part of their clothing. It's not a respect issue for them. Times do change. Styles change, etc. Please don't judge the next generation too harshly because their behavior is different than our is/was. Finally, remember that sometimes people wear hats for medical or religious reasons as well.
This is basically every discussion the iGentry have, which usually ends up with top hat and tails as the only acceptable attire, except morning dress before 6pm.
The reality is fashion and acceptable dress evolve. The 1960's were different than the 1920's were different than the 1880's. The entire point is to present well in the context of our time.
i don't feel any need to take off a hat in a public place where i generally don't interact with the public - malls, museums, supermarkets etc. but i'll always take off my hat in a
place of worship or memorial, during a national anthem, when meeting someone new, or when eating with anyone. i'm absolutely not above taking a moment to observe the
importance of those occasions or meetings.
place of worship or memorial, during a national anthem, when meeting someone new, or when eating with anyone. i'm absolutely not above taking a moment to observe the
importance of those occasions or meetings.
Hi,
When Miss Manners wrote the rules in the late 1800s, the dividing line was public vs. private buildings. So, the hat is removed immediately upon entering a private building. Homes and apartments and such. It is removed whereever one would also remove a coat in a public building. This also holds true for workplaces which are also considered public for this discussion.
So, when entering your house, I would remove my hat and coat immediately upon crossing the threshold, then give it to you to put away for me.
When entering work, my hat and coat stay on until I get to either the cloak room (if any still exist) or my workspace, where I would take both off and hang them up myself.
When entering a restaurant, I would remove both at the coat and hat check (some still exist. The hotel ballroom areas, for example.) or leave them on until seated. Like others, if there is no hook set, or no spare seat, it remains on my head. I also inform our server of the fact it is still perched up there due to their establishment's oversight.
In places of worship the hat is removed upon crossing the threshold even if the coat remains on since such a place is considered a residence.
Elevators are interesting. In hotels and apartment buildings, the hat comes off in the elevator. But not in other elevators. Unless engaged in conversation with a lady. Then it comes off as soon as the conversation begins. You tip your hat in greetings, and hope she actually starts a conversation as well.
Ladies, of course, never remove their hats anywhere. Not even in church. Nor for the playing of any National Anthem. Unless it is a ballcap, which is not considered to be a hat for a lady.
Stan
When Miss Manners wrote the rules in the late 1800s, the dividing line was public vs. private buildings. So, the hat is removed immediately upon entering a private building. Homes and apartments and such. It is removed whereever one would also remove a coat in a public building. This also holds true for workplaces which are also considered public for this discussion.
So, when entering your house, I would remove my hat and coat immediately upon crossing the threshold, then give it to you to put away for me.
When entering work, my hat and coat stay on until I get to either the cloak room (if any still exist) or my workspace, where I would take both off and hang them up myself.
When entering a restaurant, I would remove both at the coat and hat check (some still exist. The hotel ballroom areas, for example.) or leave them on until seated. Like others, if there is no hook set, or no spare seat, it remains on my head. I also inform our server of the fact it is still perched up there due to their establishment's oversight.
In places of worship the hat is removed upon crossing the threshold even if the coat remains on since such a place is considered a residence.
Elevators are interesting. In hotels and apartment buildings, the hat comes off in the elevator. But not in other elevators. Unless engaged in conversation with a lady. Then it comes off as soon as the conversation begins. You tip your hat in greetings, and hope she actually starts a conversation as well.
Ladies, of course, never remove their hats anywhere. Not even in church. Nor for the playing of any National Anthem. Unless it is a ballcap, which is not considered to be a hat for a lady.
Stan
When I was young and would go to church, the pews had a little spring-loaded widget. Actually, each pew had about 8 of them. During the mass, I would play with these hooks. Clip the missal to it, my gloves, etc. . . Finally one day I asked my mother what these contraptions were meant to do. She told me that they were men's hat clips. This blew my mind because even back then, not many people were wearing hats. I've never seen these anywhere else that I can recall. So I certainly understand the frustration of those in the thread with trying to find a place to store one's hat. I've never worn hats but they would certainly come off indoors if I did.
Hi,
When I was a kid, the older movie theaters had these wire holders under the seat base. The seats were spring loaded, so the bottoms were all flipped up. A man could slip his hat in the holder, then push the seat bottom down to sit. Hat was nicely out of the way. These days, I get to hold my hat in my lap. Sigh.
Stan
When I was a kid, the older movie theaters had these wire holders under the seat base. The seats were spring loaded, so the bottoms were all flipped up. A man could slip his hat in the holder, then push the seat bottom down to sit. Hat was nicely out of the way. These days, I get to hold my hat in my lap. Sigh.
Stan
Commander Quan
Commander Yellow Pantyhose
Why is is appropriate for a lady to wear a hat in all of these places that it is forbidden for men to do so? Do we just assume that women are heathens and that they'll do whatever they want anyway, so we let them get away with it?
I don't think that most of the societal norms regarding dress can be dismissed as being so arbitrary. Most have (or had, depending on their longevity) a basis in some form of rational thought. Occasionally, the norms can devolve into rigid "rules" ... the one about not wearing white garments before or after specific American public holidays springs to mind ... which can seem unthinkingly inflexible, but on the whole they make sense once you think about them.
(Insert joke about Tim Horton's being a Canadian National Shrine)
Try a linen "flat cap".
A very casual hat that can stand a lot of abuse, and it crosses the threshold from "baseball cap" to "real hat", so it's "dressy enough" for most occasions.
Hi,
Ladies' hats are much more complicated than men's hats, so much so that they have a separate specialty known as Millinary (as opposed to Hatting). Their hats are taller, wider and much more heavily decorated than men's hats. When a lady dons a hat, it is attached to her hair with several hatpins to keep it from taking off in even a light breeze. It takes a lady on the order of 15 minutes to don or doff her hat, so it stays on always.
Note, though, that women wearing sports ballcaps are not accorded the grace of leaving them on. They get to follow the same rules as men.
Stan
Women can wear hats inside because you can't get away with smacking them in the back of the head if they do. At least not like you used to back in the day when people were truely more polite.
- Thread starter
- #57
So I've read through all of the responses, and for the record, I'm a hat off at the dinner table, office work and church. I won't take it off shopping or in my own house...it's my house I'll do as I please (still no hats at dinner). I tend to agree with some of the sentiments that it has just become less formal over time. Most of my generation who are in their 30's and 40's now grew up when men largely didn't wear formal hats, so much of the etiquette simply wasn't there to pass down, it what was left is in bits and pieces. I'll also agree that sometimes it's the "feel" of the occasion that dictates whether I'll take my hat off or not. If I have friends over, or family I couldn't care less if they have a hat on or not, that's not the point. I'm there to socialize and frankly hats just really don't invoke too much emotion if we're just sitting around shooting the breeze whether or not we're indoors or out.
That depends on whether you're the guard or not. If you're the one on duty at the post then your cover stays on, even if the post is inside.
