Thoughts on the untimely death and quiet resurgence of manly rituals

a few weeks ago, i found myself in the position of trying to explain my newfound interest in traditional wet shaving to a friend of mine. he's a thoroughly modern fellow and he uses modern shaving tools because, well...it's what modern guys do.

as i described the process to him, the paraphernalia, the pleasure, the advantages....one item provoked the strongest reaction. he was dismayed and appalled that i took 20 minutes to shave in the morning and that's really when it hit me. when you look at the rise of technology and the death of manly rituals, inevitably the clock is to blame. we have sacrificed a whole host of pleasures on the altar of time and we are ultimately the poorer for it.

the pipe gives way to the cigarette. the ocean liner gives way to the airplane. the restaurant becomes the drive-through and the conversation becomes the text message...and all because we, as men, continue to believe that if we could just save a bit more time in our day we'd be able to really get to the things we wanted to do. ironically, in the pursuit of having enough time to do what we want we are forced to dilute or discard the very things we wanted in the first place...and so our vitality dwindles away with every tick of the relentless clock.

perhaps that is why in some sense we're all here at B&B. we want to recapture a forgotten pleasure. we want to revel in the luxury of choosing what we do with our morning routine and most of all, we want to remember the simple joy of not taking the quickest or most expedient road, but the sweet meandering path of our own curiosity.

this weekend as i was rushing through a morning shave i thought about all of this. i took a breath, and remembered that there was nothing on the agenda that couldn't wait just a few minutes more. in the moment of that realization, i became once again the master of the clock instead of its servant and my little daily ritual took on an added sweetness that hadn't been there just a moment before.

i wish for everyone here a similar moment of timeless indulgence. in the day to day flow of obligation and expectation, i encourage you to find a moment to ignore the demands of the clock and take pleasure in this mutual interest we all share. gentlemen, i wish for you all a truly excellent shave.

+1

That, sir, is one very well put post. That is exactly why I am here, to take my time and enjoyu what I once rushed through, and to revel in one of the things that makes a guy, a guy.


Well said.

drandall said:

i wish for everyone here a similar moment of timeless indulgence. in the day to day flow of obligation and expectation, i encourage you to find a moment to ignore the demands of the clock and take pleasure in this mutual interest we all share. gentlemen, i wish for you all a truly excellent shave.

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Amen to that!

Very well said Sir! Since I shave both my head and face every day I allow ample time to truly enjoy the shave every day!!! A task I formerly dreaded!

Regards,

I thank you sir. We live to and run to live but does it all really make any sense? I hurry because I'm late but mostly hurry just to wait.
I agree, slow down and enjoy the moment because just like that...it's gone!

that was a beautiful post, almost poetry

It is important not to waste time, it is the only thing you can sell, but can never buy. In today's society where everything is blended, squeezed and processed there is a loss of texture in our lives and that makes it a quality of life issue. I wet shave because the shave that I get starts the day with a quality experience that carries on thought the day. Good post.

Take Care,
Richard

Thank you for putting it so clearly. I don't know how old you are, but this is a trend that has plagued me for my 50 plus years. One simple example from my working life: Business letters that required a prompt response still allowed a little time for thought. They were replaced by faxes, requiring faster responses, which were replaced by emails requiring instant responses without any time for careful reflection. Are we better off?

May I just say, very well said!

Reasonably well put, good man.

Hear hear! The clock is our greatest foe!

And what happened to all that time we save? How many people only have to work a thirty-hour week becuse of all the time-saving devices? Or have time to write a novel and take up mountain-climbing? When my old granny served chicken for dinner, first she had to chase one down and kill it and pluck it. My wife grabs one out of the refrigerator, ready to go. And compains that "there just aren't enough hours in the day". What happened? I think we have all been diddled on this "time-saving" stuff.

Roman414 said:

And what happened to all that time we save? How many people only have to work a thirty-hour week becuse of all the time-saving devices? Or have time to write a novel and take up mountain-climbing? When my old granny served chicken for dinner, first she had to chase one down and kill it and pluck it. My wife grabs one out of the refrigerator, ready to go. And compains that "there just aren't enough hours in the day". What happened? I think we have all been diddled on this "time-saving" stuff.

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Don't you think this is a discipline issue? Technology and modern marvels can save us time, but how do we spend that extra time? I use to watch WAY too much TV. I'm on this forum way too much (B&B. Why can't I quit you?). I do too much freelance design outside of my day job. I'm spreading myself thin and wondering where all the time has gone.

More time is like a bigger house. Most people want it. But when they get it, they just fill it with junk.

Mr Mockett said:

Hear hear! The clock is our greatest foe!

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Nowadays there are lots of people that enjoy traffic jams when they go to work in the morning. They have a little peace and quiet in their car. Makes sense, they hurry their shave, their breakfast and other manly rituals, but we still need our rest.

I enjoy getting out of bed in my own time, enjoy the 20-minute shave, eat my breakfast and then cruise to work, luckily without any traffic jams. That way, I can start my day in a relaxed state of mind.

+1

My daughter now runs into the bathroom when I'm shaving and waits anxiously to roll the brush for me (I Method Shave exclusively--"rolling the brush" is simply making an "OK" sign with your thum and forefinger around the base of the bristles and coaxing all of the remaining mix up and out). It's a simple little routine that makes me smile and I hope continues as fond memories for her. Wetshaving gives me a framework to start each day on _my_ terms.

Great insight into how technology that's meant to be time-saving ends up diminishing our quality of life. Even look at the evolution of well-thought-out handwritten letters...to the telephone phone..to email...to IM and "twittering". Though we all benefit from increased inter-connectedness, we also often communicate in half-thoughts and phrases, and the medium allows us to be reactionary instead of thoughtful.

I think much of my appreciation of wet-shaving stems from the fact that it slows down my day enough to do something for myself that's mindful and attentive. You have to be in the moment, or it's gonna make you pay (love that..it's like instant kharma with a blade.) And I think it's why I like purchasing all of the soaps and creams...they enhance that 15 minutes that I carve out for myself every day.

Eloquently said, man!

You are absolutely right about "shortcuts" made to everyday things as well as the Death of Manly Rituals.

Last week I was in Charleston, SC for a wedding and a couple of friends of mine (A male and a female) were in my hotel room hangin' out. Well, I decided to pull out some clothes and proceeded to iron them and my two friends were looking at me like I was crazy!
They said,"Don't you send yer stuff to the dry cleaners?!?!". I told them that I iron my clothes myself and that I actually enjoy it. "A zen thing", I told'em.
I gave them a quick lesson (I am 38 and they are both in thier late 20's) on the satisfaction of not only doing something for yourself, but The Lost Art of Manliness.
My guy buddy laughed and scoffed, but my female friend understood and said that many of the guys she has dated were shortcutters and wished guys didn't always take the quick route.
Actually, she was pretty impressed! Especially when I pulled out my '59 Fatboy!

It's good to know that we here at the Badger and Blade are keeping the torch lit.

Wonderful post David, I could not agree with you more.

I know it's only Monday, but if this isn't go to be the post of the week I don't know what will.

This thread arrived in a particularly timely fashion for me, as I have just returned from vacation at the Grand Canyon, where a million years is the tick of a clock. Perhaps it is our inibility to resolve the concept of our mortality that forces us to squeeze every last second out of our day. This may be misguided, for although Einstein has shown us that the faster you move the slower time goes, when you pause and free yourself, time can stand still.

Excellent post, David. Another characteristic of those born pre- 1950 (at least around here) is their fondness for gardening. When I was a boy, every house had a well-kept garden. The bigger, the better. On Saturdays, all the old guys would be out there puttering in their gardens, and happy to be there. You could go to the store and buy a can of purple hull peas for a quarter, but that's no fun! I spent many an afternoon shelling those things and watching my fingers turn purple. Baby boomers like myself just buy the cans from the supermarket, but we're missing a rewarding experience, IMO.

To illustrate how serious my Grandfather was about gardening, one year he broke his leg just before planting time. He quickly rounded up help to get the seeds in the ground, and in a very few days, he was back out there with a cast on his leg, running a tiller up and down the rows.