loading new firmware in a Porsche back in the 60's
Jokes that make you groan
- Thread starter Captain Pre-Capsize
- Start date
My English Mastiff scares people and they won't come near her.
My smallish German Shepherd is approached by everyone wanting to pet her.
They got it all backwards.
The Shepherd is very territorial and does NOT like strangers.
The Mastiff doesn't have an ounce of aggression, and will let chipmunks scamper across right in front of her nose. She's 7 years old and she has barked maybe 5 times, all before she was 2.
What’s made of brass and sounds like Tom Jones?
Trombones
A husband and wife are on safari in Africa. ‘Look’, he says, ‘lion tracks! You see where they go and I’ll find out where they come from.’
I was reading the news and saw that scientists in Alaska have discovered a new, toothless bear species. They have decided to call them gummy bears.
Someone asked me if I could do an impression of a tortoise.
I said I’m going to stick my neck out and say yes.
I said I’m going to stick my neck out and say yes.
Not a joke but who knows...
We were playing the board game The Game of Life. It was a random game play of something we hadn't played in a long while.
An Action card came up that players had to make a joke and make the player who drew the Action card, laugh. My nephew did a tv show presentation with both his hands towards me, not saying anything. We all laughed quite hard, i didn't get any in game money either...
We were playing the board game The Game of Life. It was a random game play of something we hadn't played in a long while.
An Action card came up that players had to make a joke and make the player who drew the Action card, laugh. My nephew did a tv show presentation with both his hands towards me, not saying anything. We all laughed quite hard, i didn't get any in game money either...
Two guys were having a heated discussion over whether a man can become a woman. A scientist walks up, and says he was involved in a study to prove just that. They took 50 men, and had them each drink 10 shots of whiskey. The results of the study proved 100% that a man can become a woman - because they made no sense and couldn't drive.
A man and a woman who had never met before found themselves assigned to the same sleeping room on a Trans-continental train. Though initially embarrassed and uneasy over sharing a room, they were both very tired and fell asleep quickly.....He in the upper bunk and she in the lower. At 1:00 AM, the man leaned down and gently woke the woman saying, "Ma'am, I'm sorry to bother you, but would you be willing to reach into the closet to get me a second blanket? I'm awfully cold."
"I have a better idea," she replied. "Just for tonight, let's pretend we're married."
"Wow! That's a great idea!" he exclaimed.
"Good," she replied. "Get your own !@#$%^& blanket."
After a moment of silence, he farted.
"I have a better idea," she replied. "Just for tonight, let's pretend we're married."
"Wow! That's a great idea!" he exclaimed.
"Good," she replied. "Get your own !@#$%^& blanket."
After a moment of silence, he farted.
I bought a new plane the other day.
I was disappointed they wouldn’t let me keep the hangar.
I was disappointed they wouldn’t let me keep the hangar.
Does anyone have any tips on how to reverse plastic surgery? I’m all ears.
Ask that Van Go guy.
Ear Ear! Good thinking, me ol’ china!
Similar threads
- Locked
