I received a bottle of Pinaud's Lilac Vegetal as an early Father's Day gift. (Long story.)
Since it was the last of the official Pinaud/Clubman fragrances that I had to try - not to mention that I have read pretty much every thread dedicated to this infamous aftershave - I have to admit, I was a little excited.
When I first opened the bottle, a scent that reminded me of my grandma's funeral hit my nose. There was an overbearing stench of flowers, with a slight hint of retirement center, followed by....well....death.
On the bright side, I didn't smell the "urinal cake" odor that so many have used to describe it.
I was so disappointed. I have never been let down by Pinaud, but I knew this was the first.
I moped my way into the shower, where I thought about all the things I could've bought with the $7 I used to pay for this "funeral home in a bottle".
I had already made the decision that I was going to wear it today, no matter what. I figured I paid for it, I might as well make the best of it. (In my dad's vernacular: "You grew it, you chew it.")
I shaved, hesitantly, knowing my fate of being chosen was on the line.
What was I going to report to the people of B&B?
After my shave, I took another whiff of the bottle and looked at the label to see if I accidentally ordered the feminine version. The label said, CRISP - masculine fragrance.
I guess my definition of 'masculine fragrance' and Pinaud's definition are different things.
I poured some of the infernal juice into my hands and splashed it on my face.
Was I really willing to smell like my dead grandma all day, just to prove a point?
Then it happened. The Veg changed. The only way I can describe it is that it transformed from 'funeral home' to 'gardening center'. (Those of you that have been chosen know what I'm talking about.) Not only did I not hate it on my face, I actually loved it.
After all of that, I did my usual morning routine of waking up my wife with a kiss. (It's a good way to test my shave and my aftershave.) She squinted at me and said, "What kind of aftershave is that?"
"It's 'The Veg'. Do you like it?"
"Actually, I do," she replied. "Much better than I had imagined."
I guess this means I have been chosen.
Since it was the last of the official Pinaud/Clubman fragrances that I had to try - not to mention that I have read pretty much every thread dedicated to this infamous aftershave - I have to admit, I was a little excited.
When I first opened the bottle, a scent that reminded me of my grandma's funeral hit my nose. There was an overbearing stench of flowers, with a slight hint of retirement center, followed by....well....death.
On the bright side, I didn't smell the "urinal cake" odor that so many have used to describe it.
I was so disappointed. I have never been let down by Pinaud, but I knew this was the first.
I moped my way into the shower, where I thought about all the things I could've bought with the $7 I used to pay for this "funeral home in a bottle".
I had already made the decision that I was going to wear it today, no matter what. I figured I paid for it, I might as well make the best of it. (In my dad's vernacular: "You grew it, you chew it.")
I shaved, hesitantly, knowing my fate of being chosen was on the line.
What was I going to report to the people of B&B?
After my shave, I took another whiff of the bottle and looked at the label to see if I accidentally ordered the feminine version. The label said, CRISP - masculine fragrance.
I guess my definition of 'masculine fragrance' and Pinaud's definition are different things.
I poured some of the infernal juice into my hands and splashed it on my face.
Was I really willing to smell like my dead grandma all day, just to prove a point?
Then it happened. The Veg changed. The only way I can describe it is that it transformed from 'funeral home' to 'gardening center'. (Those of you that have been chosen know what I'm talking about.) Not only did I not hate it on my face, I actually loved it.
After all of that, I did my usual morning routine of waking up my wife with a kiss. (It's a good way to test my shave and my aftershave.) She squinted at me and said, "What kind of aftershave is that?"
"It's 'The Veg'. Do you like it?"
"Actually, I do," she replied. "Much better than I had imagined."
I guess this means I have been chosen.
