I smell dead people

**ouch** · 08-15-2006, 06:10 AM

You can't make this stuff up.

I received a package of samples from one of our highly esteemed senior members yesterday. Unable to contain my childlike glee, I had to pop open a vial of D. R. Harris sandalwood aftershave and splash on a few drops.

My nine year old future supermodel walks in, sniffs the air, looks at me with her pie plate eyes and says,

"I smell dead people."

She's becoming quite the little reviewer, I must say. Here's her take on Penhaligon's Castile-

"Rotting oranges and armpit hair."

Geeze. Talk about a tough customer.

**thatbrian** · 08-15-2006, 06:21 AM

With those kinds of reviews she should be able to save you tons of money!

**Joedy** · 08-15-2006, 06:25 AM

Better yet.... put some water in an empty container and splash it on.

And then, harden your heart from her piercing critique...

-joedy

**Scotto** · 08-15-2006, 06:33 AM

Maybe she meant "I smell old people", a common turn of phrase from my kids.

**ouch** · 08-15-2006, 06:40 AM

Originally Posted by Scotto

Maybe she meant "I smell old people", a common turn of phrase from my kids.

Nope. She already used that one for Hamman Bouqet- old people at a funeral.

Whatever review I give for it, it will pale in comparison. Thanks for the samples. I want to try the Green Pond at the end of a three day sandalwood session to get the full effect.

**Quagmire** · 08-15-2006, 06:43 AM

this makes me look forward to when my son is born even more than I am now. I can't wait till he's old enough to say funny phases like that.

**Joedy** · 08-15-2006, 06:55 AM

Originally Posted by Quagmire

this makes me look forward to when my son is born even more than I am now. I can't wait till he's old enough to say funny phases like that.

Be careful.... You might well eat those words....

Case in point, my wife and 3 year old son were in Londons (www.shoplondons.com) and smelling the, "smelly things" as he puts it.

Took a wiff of something from Truefitt and Hill and said very, very loudly while waving his hand in front of his face, "Whew! That one is stinky!"

All of the Londons employees could not help, but to hear him. Luckily, they thought it was funny.

The irony of it all..... (I thought it was stinky, too.)

-joedy

**Joedy** · 08-15-2006, 06:58 AM

Originally Posted by ouch

Nope. She already used that one for Hamman Bouqet- old people at a funeral...

I love Hammam!

Seriously, use the water and tell her that it's a new fragrance from some boy-teen hearthrob.

At this rate, you're quickly heading towards something with, "Brittany Spears" printed on the label!

-joedy

**fuerein** · 08-15-2006, 07:27 AM

So, has your scent critic had any positive reviews of any colognes?

**Suzuki** · 08-15-2006, 07:50 AM

Originally Posted by Quagmire

this makes me look forward to when my son is born even more than I am now. I can't wait till he's old enough to say funny phases like that.

Even better is when they want to be lathered up and shave.

My guy (5.5) insists on picking the soap/cream (likes lavender and sandalwood), doing two passes (he uses a schick disposable with a blade guard that clips on very securly - although on reflection, I think I'll give him an old superspeed to use instead, not sure why I didn't think of this before?). He then insists on putting on a/s splash (aka smelly stuff) and has an afinity for Proraso and Tabac!

**guenron** · 08-15-2006, 09:00 AM

Originally Posted by ouch

You can't make this stuff up.

I received a package of samples from one of our highly esteemed senior members yesterday. Unable to contain my childlike glee, I had to pop open a vial of D. R. Harris sandalwood aftershave and splash on a few drops.

My nine year old future supermodel walks in, sniffs the air, looks at me with her pie plate eyes and says,

"I smell dead people."

She's becoming quite the little reviewer, I must say. Here's her take on Penhaligon's Castile-

"Rotting oranges and armpit hair."

Geeze. Talk about a tough customer.

Good grief! What do keep around the house so that they can develop these similies?

**JohnnyWolf** · 08-15-2006, 09:27 AM

Wow, she's definetely on the track to having the super model personality. lol. But seriously, that's pretty ingenious and hard spoken of her, you have a tought critic on your hands!

**jduffy** · 08-15-2006, 09:32 AM

From the mouths of babes.....

**ouch** · 08-15-2006, 09:37 AM

Originally Posted by JohnnyWolf

Wow, she's definetely on the track to having the super model personality. lol. But seriously, that's pretty ingenious and hard spoken of her, you have a tought critic on your hands!

You should see her food reviews.

**JohnnyWolf** · 08-15-2006, 09:40 AM

Originally Posted by ouch

You should see her food reviews.

Please do share. Start with the brussel sprout review.

**ouch** · 08-15-2006, 09:50 AM

Let's just say that at her age, ketchup is a vegetable.

There's a pizzeria in town that she refuses to frequent because she found a small (~1/4") piece of tomato skin in her slice four years ago.

**Arby** · 08-15-2006, 10:10 AM

Have you signed her up at basenotes.net?

Ron

**stropmegently** · 08-15-2006, 10:47 AM

Originally Posted by ouch

Let's just say that at her age, ketchup is a vegetable.
[/B]

You mean ketchup is not a vegetable

I LOVE ketchup

Darren

**Joedy** · 08-15-2006, 10:55 AM

Originally Posted by ouch

...
There's a pizzeria in town that she refuses to frequent because she found a small (~1/4") piece of tomato skin in her slice four years ago.

Sounds like she'll make some lucky fella happy one day...

I hope for his sake that he doesn't like tomatoes... (smile)

You should aspire to wear something that smells like tomatoes.... or at least ketchup.

-joedy

**ouch** · 08-15-2006, 11:13 AM

Originally Posted by Joedy

Sounds like she'll make some lucky fella happy one day...

-joedy

Don't they all?

To show you what the future holds for that lucky guy, here's something I posted in another forum-

"By the way, the last time I returned from Canada, the following true story occurred. The border guard leaned in, looked at my wife, and, having decided that she was being held against her will (I get that a lot), asked her, "Of what country are you a citizen?"
Her response: "New York."

He looked at me, sighed, gave me that "you obviously have a lot more problems to deal with than being arrested for human trafficking" look, and signalled for me to pass. I couldn't stop laughing, and it took over fifty miles for her to figure out what she said."