The 3000 post PIF

Well, folks, here it is. My 3000th post. An epic event, for me anyway. So I think it's only fitting that I do a PIF.

Up for grabs is a razor. What razor, you ask? Well, heck, even I don't know yet, but I bet it will be a nice one. I'm not home at the moment. I'll pick one out this evening when I get there. I'll post a pic of my selection

Rules? We don't need no stinkin' rules. Well maybe a little.

Everyone from any where is eligible, so long as I can send it USPS.

Just post "I'm in", and tell a nice clean joke.

Winner will be at my whim, no random number generator, no picking post numbers from my Indiana Jones Fedora.

I'll pick a winner on Thursday, July 31. Just don't forget a joke
How about 2 winners

How does the man on the moon cut his hair.

Answer= eclipse it.

I'm in. A man goes into a bank and asks the clerk, "I want to get a loan. Can I please speak to the loan arranger?" The clerk answers, "I'm sorry, but he is not here today." The man responds with another question, "Well then, can I speak to Tonto?"
cottontop

I'm in.

Don't bother telling a kleptomaniac a pun because they take everything literally.

Im in!

Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill?

To get to the bottom!!!

I'm in. Very cool PIF. Looking forward to reading these. Thank you kindly, sir.

Q: How do you get a Klenex to dance?
A: You put a little boogey in it.

I'm in.

Mother Therese dies and goes to heaven. God opens a can of tuna and the two share a humble meal. From her vantage point in heaven, Mother Therese can't help but notice that in Hell they are feasting on lobster and prime rib. She asks God to explain the disparity. He replies, "I know, I know...but with only the two of us, who feels like cooking?"

I'm in.

What did the 500 lb canary say to the cat?
Here, kitty kitty kitty!

I am "NOT IN". But it sounds like fun, so I will be checking back to read the jokes!!

I'm in.

Why do seagulls fly over the sea?

Because if they flew over the bay, they'd be called bagels.

I'm in.

Question: What's brown and sticky?

Answer: A stick

I'm in.
An Auburn can and a Alabama fan were watching the 6 o'clock news where a man is on a ledge about to jump. The bama fan says I bet $10 he jumps the Auburn fan says you are on. They keep watching the man jumps the Auburn fan is upset. The bama fan says it's not right for me to take your money I saw the story earlier on the 5 o'clock news. The auburn can says me too but I didn't think he would jump twice.

I'm in. Thank you for the opportunity.

Why did Tigger stick his head in the toilet?
He was looking for Pooh!

I'm not in, but here is a joke.

At a bar, one patron to another: “Excuse me but I think you owe me a drink.”
Why?
“You’re so ugly that I dropped mine when I saw you”

I'm in!

Two conmen go up to 20 blind men and say "Do you want to take a vacation?" The blind men reply "yeah of course" So the blind men give the conmen , $2000 each. The conmen drive them up and put them on the beach, and then go to the bar, While there they think that the blind men are going to get bored. So they buy them a ball and give it to them. The blind men go "Whats this?" "Its a ball," replies one of the conmen "Well we can't see it!" The conmen think crap what we gonna do, they spot a donkey with bells round its neck so they go and buy sum bells and wrap them round the ball, and then go back the bar. Just then an old woman walks in and says "I tell you what the world today its demented" "Why?" ask the fraud men. "Because theres 20 blind men kicking crap through a donkey on the beach!"

I'm not in but very nice PIF and great idea for clean jokes! I'm coming up on my 3,000 post and trying to put together a PIF. Stay tuned fellas!

I'm in. Thank you!

How does the solar system throw a party?

They Planet

I'm in.


What do you call a fat guy who tests pee?

A meaty-urogist.

I'm in!

little tim comes running into class and says "teacher teacher, I just saw a dog in the street and a car drove up and hit him right in the he butt hole!" Tim's teacher says "Tim, we don't say that, we say 'rectum'". Tim says "rectum?! Hell it killed'um!!


wa wa wa..........

I'm in.
What did 0 say to 8?

Hey nice belt!