PIF - AOS Sandalwood Cream & ASB + T&H preshave oil

Hello Gents,

I'd like to PIF a travel size of the Art of Shaving Sandalwood cream & aftershave balm along with some Truefitt & Hill preshave oil. I'd prefer for them to go to somebody who has not used these products. There's plenty of product in the AOS tubes, but obviously it's hard to determine how much. I think I've used them about 6-7 times.

I work with kids, so to enter I ask that you submit a PG rated joke to add to my arsenal. Bad jokes are a perk of the job . I'll simply pick the one I like the most. Lets end the PIF Monday night 8:00 EST. I'll ship the products out on Tuesday.

bring 'em on!

I'm in - Very cool PIF. I just asked my 6yr old daughter for a joke and this is what she told me...

'What did the ghost have for dinner?'

Spoo-ghetti.

'Why was the spider on the computer?'

Because it was on a web-site

Hope this helps add some more stuff to your arsenal.

Ben

What word becomes shorter when you add two letters?

SHORT!

Can February March?

April May

Hope that helps would love the PIF! I have always wanted to smell AOS Sandalwood scent.

A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says, "why the long face"

A kid probably wouldn't get that. But it's probably the only joke that I know that wouldn't get me banned from B&B. lol, I'm in, my joke qualifies me. If not, it's all good and good luck to everyone else.

Max.

This is an oldie, but here goes: "Why was 6 Afraid of 7? Because Seven Ate 9." I'm in for the PIF!

What do you call a pig that know karate?

Pork chop.

I'm in.
What's a Pirates favorite letter?

(R) Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrhhhhhhhhhhhhh

I'm in.

And now for the joke. A four year old boy walks over to a pregnant lady while in the waiting room. "Why is your stomach so big?" the young boy asks. "I'm having a baby," the woman says. "Is the baby in your tummy?" the child asks. "Yes, it is," the lady said. "Is it a good baby?" the child asked. "Yes, a really good baby," the lady said. Shocked and surprised, the child says: "then why did you eat him?"

ba-dum-pah.

Cheers.

John

What did Geronimo say when he jumped out of the airplane?

Me!


my all time favorite joke, which gets spiced up are the bar.

A duck walked up to a lemonade stand and he said to the man running the stand "Hey you got any grapes?" The man said "no we just sell lemonade." The duck waddled away. The next day, the duck walked up to the lemonade stand And he said to the man that was running the stand "Hey you got any grapes?" The man said "no, like I said yesterday, we just sell lemonade okay?" The duck waddled away. The next day, the duck walked up to the lemonade stand And he said to the man that was running the stand "hey you got any grapes?" The man said "look, this is getting old. Lemonade’s all we’ve ever sold." The duck waddled away. The next day the duck walked up to the lemonade stand and he said to the man that was running the stand "hey you got any grapes?" The man said "THAT’S IT!! If you don’t stay away duck, I’ll glue you to a tree and leave you there all day. The duck waddled away. The next day the duck walked up to the lemonade stand and he said to the man that was running the stand "hey you got any glue?" "No I don't have any glue, I don't run a hardware store." "Then one more question for you: Got any grapes?"

Im in!

Why did the farmer receive an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field

I'm in...here goes:

Q: Who can shave six times a day, and still have a full beard?

A: A barber.

Why do barbers always win in a race?
"They know the best short cuts"

Where do Generals keep their armies?
"In their sleevies"

I am definitely in, and thanks for an awesome PIF.

Why does Snoop Dogg carry an Umbrella?

For Drizzle

I'm in!

Bond, Municipal Bond.

It's an accounting joke.

I'm out. I have the AoS, just wanted to leave a joke.

I already have them so I am out, but feel free to steal these gems:

Two fish were sitting in their tank, one looked at the other and said "you man the guns, I'll drive."

Two hats were sitting on a rack, one looked at the other and said "Wait here, I'm going on ahead."

I'm in!

A tiger was walking through the jungle one day and saw two men relaxing under a tree. One was reading a newspaper, and the other was working feverishly on a manual typewriter.


The tiger leapt on the man with the newspaper, and ate him up. The tiger did not bother the other man at all. That's because any predator knows that readers digest but writers cramp.

----------------------

There were three men on a hill with their watches.


The first man threw his watch down the hill and it broke.


The second man threw his watch down the hill and it broke.


The third man threw his watch down the hill, walked all the way to the bottom, and caught it.


The other two men were puzzled and asked the third man how he did it.


The third man said, "Easy. My watch is 5 minutes slow!"

I'm in.

Two archeological students and their professor are digging in the Fertile Crescent in the middle of summer. The conditions are horrible, the hours long and the professors expectations insatiable.


Suddenly the first student uncovers an old Sumerian oil lamp. The second student rubs it and a Genie comes out.


The Genie says, 'I'll give each of you just one wish.'


'Me first! Me first!' says Student 1. 'I want to be in the Bahamas , driving a speedboat, without a care in the world.'


Puff! He's gone.


'Me next! Me next!' says Student 2. 'I want to be somewhere with snow, skiing on the slopes, with an endless supply of hot chocolate awaiting me at the ski lodge!'


Puff! She's gone.


'OK, you're up,' the Genie says to the professor.


The professor says, 'I want those two back digging in this hole after lunch.'

Cool PIF, I'm in.

This was my favorite as a child stolen from Highlites Magazine: Why did the student eat his homework? Because his teacher told him it was a piece of cake.

I also enjoyed this riddle: If April showers bring May flower then what do May Flowers bring? Pilgrims

Great PIF. I've never tried any of those and would love to.

Q. What did the water say to the boat?
A. Nothing, it just waved.

-------------

A man walks into a barber shop and says, "I'll have a shave and a shoe shine."
The barber lathers his face and strops his straight razor while the most beautiful woman he's ever seen kneels down and shines his shoes.
The man says to the woman "How'd you like to go out with me tonight?"
She replies, "My husband wouldn't like that."
The man says, "Tell him you're working late."
She says, "Tell him yourself -- he's standing right next to you, the one with the razor in his hand."