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What cats do when you're away:

This I believe to be true.

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Many times I've left in the morning and the cat is sleeping on the bed.

Get home 10+ hours later - and she's in the exact same spot.

What a life.
 
This reminds me of a funny story. My friend had just got back to his place and he sat his bucket of KFC on the sideboard, He goes and unloads his groceries from the car, comes back in and finds the KFC is tipped on it's side and the cat under his bed eating a drumstick.
 
One shreds my toilet paper, one acts like a rug or a vent cover whether we are here or not (based on the fact he is in the same place position when we leave and when we get home AND he's fat and lazy) and the third one.......?? I wish I knew.
 
Anyone seen that video of a cat barking, that's right barking out the window (presumably at another dog) untill the cat realizes he's being filmed, then starts to meow lamely. Things that make you go hmmm...MIB?
 
I've been working from home for about a month and I've noticed that on most days the cat will go up to the dog (chocolate lab) around lunch time, bash his head into the dogs and the two will share a moment before they both go back to sleep on their respective cushions.
 
Reminds me of another funny story...

So my grandma and grandpa had a cat back in the early eighties. Her name was Roxie, I think. Roxie was pretty partial to my grandpa - and she couldn't stand my grandmother. I think the feeling was mutual for my Mee Maw, as she really wasn't a pet person.

So my grandpa had to do some work at his company one Thanksgiving morning, but he'd be back home in time for Thanksgiving dinner in the afternoon. Mee Maw is in the kitchen making biscuits and Roxie hops up on to the counter right next to her, looking innocent and starts purring. My grandma thinks maybe ol' Roxie has finally developed a soft spot for her.

"Hey Roxie! You want some biscuits?" my grandma says.

All of a sudden Roxie turns into Mr. Hyde. She arches her back and lets out a "RRRRRRRROWWWWWWWWL" and starts hissing at my grandma.

My grandma then proceeds to throw the tin of biscuits at the cat, "Well here. Take these *&@%ing biscuits!"

My grandma calls my grandfather, saying that there is an emergency. He rushes home thinking the house is on fire. He comes home early to find my grandmother smoking furiously in the dining room, scotch in hand, rotary telephone in her other hand as she complains to my mom about Roxie. The cat is prancing around the kitchen, biscuit mix everywhere, rubbing up my grandfather's leg.

"Anne, what did you do to this poor cat?"

Funny. Funny. I miss my grandparents a lot. They were a hoot.

Not sure what happened to Roxie. I think she ran afoul the black lab next door. :sad:
 
Two things to share on this subject:

1st -- you can't teach a cat to not do something -- in its mind, you are simply requesting that it refrain from the behavior while you are home. (And if you are very lucky it may indulge the request from the insignificant two-legged creature with whom it is vaguely aware of sharing a home.)

Which leads to this....

The Difference Between Dogs and Cats:
When you feed a dog, it thinks, "You're feeding me, you must be a god."
When you feed a cat, it thinks, "You're feeding me, I must be a god."
 
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