What to wear to a wedding?

A good friend of mine is getting married in two weeks, and I have been very kindly invited to the wedding. But I just realized that I have zero idea what to wear! This is the first wedding that I am attending, so it's new thing for me.

Firstly, should I have a date? Is that sort of mandatory/customary?

What do I wear? Presumably no jeans. But do I do a tie? Jacket?

And should I change for the reception into something more casual? Or just go to it in my wedding attire?

If you are not part of the wedding party (i.e. a groomsman) Than I would stick with some clean & pressed gray dress slacks, black dress shoes, white shirt (barrel or french cuff is your choice) & a necktie. Avoid elastic in the waist of your pants & clip on or zipper neckties & you should be fine. Under no circumstances should you out dress the groom, nor should you wear jeans & sneakers.

If you're just a guest, not a member of the wedding, +1 on Bruce's suggestions.
Your safest bet is to find one of the women involved in the wedding (DON'T ask the guys, they'll have no idea) and run your outfit by her.

OK.. I'm going to assume you are not part of the wedding. In that case slacks, plain dress shirt and a snappy tie. Make sure your belt and shoes match. Wear the type of shoes that are comfortable and are the type that you would shine. No sneakers or the like. Socks should match your pants. Remember its a wedding NOT a funeral (avoiding obligatory joke here) so avoid dark and dreary... I find tan/light grey slacks, white dress shirt and a colorful tie (not outlandish) are good for most occasions. A sports coat/jacket is nice to wear during the ceremony but you will likely lose it during the reception. NEVER dress better than the groom or grooms men, this usually isn't a problem. Get a good shave on, your favorite after shave and cologne and have a Damn Good time!

No...dates are not obligatory. In fact I would recommend not bringing a date since often there are numerous single women at weddings.... you never who you might meet.

Only bring a guest if the invitation says "Your Name & Guest". BUT, if it DOES say that, you are not obligated to bring a guest, i.e. date. But, if it doesn't say that, it would be bad form to bring one.

Oh, and, +1 on the sartorial advice offered above.

-Greg

It is hard to go wrong with a nice suit and tie.

And if you are single I would recommend NOT taking a date. Wedding receptions are great places to meet women. Single women + the romance of a wedding ceremony + the open bar at the reception... You don't get too many "sitting duck" opportunities like that.

Thanks for the advice everyone! And yes, I am not part of the wedding party, but rather just a guest.

I probably won't bring a date then, I just had a friend off hand mention that I needed one, wasn't sure about the "rules" on that.

I'll probably just put on some slacks, shirt and tie. Thought I hope that I have non dark colored clothing, as I generally only wear dark colors (black, gray, brown, dark red/blue).

And I'll try not to dress better than the groomsmen...

legion said:

It is hard to go wrong with a nice suit and tie.

And if you are single I would recommend NOT taking a date. Wedding receptions are great places to meet women. Single women + the romance of a wedding ceremony + the open bar at the reception... You don't get too many "sitting duck" opportunities like that.

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Exactly. "Coals to Newcastle" and all that. Or, as Dean Martin would say, "It's like going to China with a sack of rice."

-Greg

This sounds like the perfect time to acquire some essentials in every mans wardrobe. I recommend light tan or light gray pants with little or no pleats. A new crisp white shirt (as "fitted" as you can find), and keep the collar on the smaller side. And some medium to dark brown shoes and belt, its surprising how going brown instead of black will give you that little something extra. With either color pants you can go with almost any tie you want depending on how much you want to stand out, and don't worry about overshadowing the groom(smen) since you wont be wearing a tux/suit. Oh and keep the tie around 2.5-3". A good diagonally striped light blue and gray tie is perfect for occasions like weddings, and go with four-in-hand or simple double knot, the asymmetry is more fun and keeps it from looking too business-y. A good example of all of this can be found at Express , but something like Macy's will have it all too. The best part about what I just described is that is a very versatile ensemble, from weddings to birthdays to first dates.

Enjoy looking sharp my friend!!

-Niraj

Well... you could wear your Birthday Suit... :O lol. Already on hand and certainly a classic....

Guess I have gotten too old! Can't imagine going in anything other than a suit and tie. But certainly agree about not outdressing the wedding party. What will the men be wearing?

as much as I prefer brown dress shoes to black.. about the only time I wouldn't go brown is with light grey, gray, charcoal or black pants. a fitted shirt only if you have a fit body.

I'd check with the bride as to how formal she's expecting the wedding and reception to be. Failing guidance, I'd wear a suit and tie, but be a little playfull with the colour of shirt and tie so as to be "fun formal" rather than "boardroom boring".

You are never 'required' to bring a date to a wedding ... only one guy has to do that, and he also has to bring a ring and a preacher.

(If you want to bring a date, be sure you ask in advance. It can matter for seating/planning the reception dinner &c. Some invitations have a place on the RSVP card to indicate how many you will be bringing; failing that or an "and guest" note, I'd check with the bride/groom before bringing anyone whose name did not appear on the invitation.)

now this is just my approach to the situation but first find out how her family stacks up any single cousins friends etc.. will you know anybody but your firend to hang out with while there if not bring a date/ friend if so go single try and meet a dane there.

as far as the outfit allways dress nice for it is a wedding but the white shirt is out dated you need to go with black slacks black shirt and a bright tie that stands out that calls the single ladies to you like man look at that guy in the pink tie. they love it

or do a grey on baby blue is a suit that i just picked up and trust me its an attention getter.

White dress shirts will NEVER be outdated.

Jawaburger said:

White dress shirts will NEVER be outdated.

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exactly..

not sure I would be interested in hooking up with a lady who would flock to a guy in black pants and black shirt at a wedding.

I must admit I out-dressed the groom at a wedding a month or so ago. The groom and groomsmen wore jeans, cowboy boots, white shirts, ties, and a jacket. I would have over-dressed just by putting on a pair of slacks.

xXClockwork said:

I must admit I out-dressed the groom at a wedding a month or so ago. The groom and groomsmen wore jeans, cowboy boots, white shirts, ties, and a jacket. I would have over-dressed just by putting on a pair of slacks.

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I think in cases like that it is perfectly acceptable!

xXClockwork said:

I must admit I out-dressed the groom at a wedding a month or so ago. The groom and groomsmen wore jeans, cowboy boots, white shirts, ties, and a jacket. I would have over-dressed just by putting on a pair of slacks.

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I believe Emily Post has wrote about this once. I believe in this instance she advised on not out-drinking the groom.

xXClockwork said:

I must admit I out-dressed the groom at a wedding a month or so ago. The groom and groomsmen wore jeans, cowboy boots, white shirts, ties, and a jacket. I would have over-dressed just by putting on a pair of slacks.

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I guess you missed the "cowboy theme" memo.

(IMHO theme weddings, while not generally my cup of tea, are fine ... but I think it behooves the hosts to alert the guests, so as to avoid having some poor dude being the only guy in a suit sticking out like a sore thumb.)