Advice for a nineteen year old

Gentlemen,
I am asking you for the most important pieces of advice you could give to me.

A little about me:
I left home at sixteen
I prefer things to be done old school (face to face correspondence, no instant coffee, wetshaving etc etc)
I suffer from clinical depression
I own my own business
I am studying to become an Osteopath
I have a loving woman and a good support network
If you make a mistake you'll know all about it
I tend not to make many mistakes but the ones I do make tend to be pretty bad

What do I need to do to make my way in the world?

Thank you
Will

Sounds like you should tell us!

WGPower said:

Gentlemen,
I am asking you for the most important pieces of advice you could give to me.

A little about me:
I left home at sixteen
I prefer things to be done old school (face to face correspondence, no instant coffee, wetshaving etc etc)
I suffer from clinical depression
I own my own business
I am studying to become an Osteopath
I have a loving woman and a good support network
If you make a mistake you'll know all about it
I tend not to make many mistakes but the ones I do make tend to be pretty bad

What do I need to do to make my way in the world?

Thank you
Will

Click to expand...

You're already on your way.

I'm 23, own my own business and left home at 14. If your an independent person like me you will all ways be fine as long as you are your own boss.

The 401K is a powerful tool if you begin to use it early. I'll let you do the math. Invest 10K annually, for 40 years, with a modest 5% return, untaxed and compounded. Then also figure the additional financial clout of paying taxes on 10K less income every year. You can quickly see that even if your other endeavors fold and fall flat, beginning NOW to invest in this no-brainer deceptively simple plan will set you up quite comfortably indeed. Now... do the math again, but this time you don't start investing the full amount until you are 30. See the difference? Invest now and live poor, rather than living large and being not so well off at retirement. Watch for the next big bubble, and don't be in it when it bursts. Don't be shy about holding cash when stocks and securities are tanking. You can buy them back when things hit bottom. Don't sell short... recipe for ruin.

You don't need half the crap that you think you need.

Be honest, even if it hurts you financially or emotionally. In the long run, it pays off. Sometimes it pays off only in pride and satisfaction, sometimes in the esteem of others, and sometimes in the wallet, but eventually, honesty even when it is tempting to misrepresent the truth will pay off one way or the other.

Always consider what you will leave behind when you leave this world, even now, at your young age. Some of us leave behind undisciplined, selfish brats, and others leave behind offspring that are respectful and respected. Some of us leave behind bitter memories, some of us nicer ones. Some of us leave behind monuments to goodness and harmony... some of us leave behind ruins of other people's works. Life is short and it can be even shorter than one would expect. Consider the legacy you will leave to the world, and work toward it daily.

The one person in the world that you should be able to truly count on, is YOU.

Murphy's Law is well-known, but doesn't cover every possible scenario. Saying that "If it CAN happen, it WILL happen, given enough opportunity" is only covering half of it. Consider instead, Slash's Law, Which states:

1. Something's gonna happen.

2. Something ALWAYS happens.

Many times something will happen, and you will say, "No way... no F'ing way... that's impossible! That couldn't have happenned!" Nevertheless, it does. So you see, the impossible can happen, too. Murphy's Law covers the possible. Slash's Law covers it all: the possible, and the impossible.

Be careful about committing to a plan. When you make plans, somebody comes along and messes them up for you. Be able to recover from the messing, and have alternate plans.

Remember, finally, the difference between happiness and success. Success is getting what you want. Happiness is wanting what you got.

"That's all I got to say about that." (Forrest Gump)

<I suffer from clinical depression>

Stay on top of that one. True clinical depression can kill you just as surely as heart disease, and destroy those around you and you before it does. It is every bit as much a disease as heart disease, too. Don't let yourself convince yourself everything is okay, if it really is not. Let that loving woman be a mirror to you and trust what she reflects back!

<If you make a mistake you'll know all about it>

Strive in your life to be forgiving--of other people and of yourself--and make sure you are not taking things personally. Pay attention to whether you are carrying anger around. If you are, Don Henley had it correct: "You keep carrying that anger, it'll eat you up inside"

<I tend not to make many mistakes but the ones I do make tend to be pretty bad>

Keep making mistakes. When you stop making mistakes you will know you have stagnated. You will have stopped acting. As long as you are alive and being proactive in the world you will make mistakes. No one is excused. One should try to learn from their mistakes, of course. But no one gets to stop making them. So forgive yourself and do not think of them as so "bad." Be humble in the best sense of the word. Be careful of being "grandiose" in any respect. Your mistakes are not going to be any worse that anyone else's except to the extent you are going for it more than someone else is, in which case the mistake is not worse, because the alternative of doing nothing is worse. (Giving advice in a vacuum as I am here is always basically a terrible idea, by the way. If what you are terming are not really mistakes, but more like some kind of self-destructive behavior, where one does something not because they are mistaken, but knowing that it is not the thing to do but deciding to do it anyway, that is something different.)

Any of that help? So what are you really wanting to ask? I doubt if you expected anyone here to tell you having a loving relationship with a significant other and have a great support network is a bad thing! Or to take a position on whether you ought to be running your own business or become an osteopath!

WGPower said:

Gentlemen,
I am asking you for the most important pieces of advice you could give to me.

A little about me:
I left home at sixteen
I prefer things to be done old school (face to face correspondence, no instant coffee, wetshaving etc etc)
I suffer from clinical depression
I own my own business
I am studying to become an Osteopath
I have a loving woman and a good support network
If you make a mistake you'll know all about it
I tend not to make many mistakes but the ones I do make tend to be pretty bad

What do I need to do to make my way in the world?

Thank you
Will

Click to expand...

Slash McCoy said:

The 401K is a powerful tool if you begin to use it early. I'll let you do the math. Invest 10K annually, for 40 years, with a modest 5% return, untaxed and compounded. Then also figure the additional financial clout of paying taxes on 10K less income every year. You can quickly see that even if your other endeavors fold and fall flat, beginning NOW to invest in this no-brainer deceptively simple plan will set you up quite comfortably indeed. Now... do the math again, but this time you don't start investing the full amount until you are 30. See the difference? Invest now and live poor, rather than living large and being not so well off at retirement. Watch for the next big bubble, and don't be in it when it bursts. Don't be shy about holding cash when stocks and securities are tanking. You can buy them back when things hit bottom. Don't sell short... recipe for ruin.

Click to expand...

+1

I have a Roth IRA and all the money from my part time job goes to fund it. Always start saving early!

WGPower said:

Gentlemen,
I am asking you for the most important pieces of advice you could give to me.

A little about me:
I left home at sixteen
I prefer things to be done old school (face to face correspondence, no instant coffee, wetshaving etc etc)
I suffer from clinical depression
I own my own business
I am studying to become an Osteopath
I have a loving woman and a good support network
If you make a mistake you'll know all about it
I tend not to make many mistakes but the ones I do make tend to be pretty bad

What do I need to do to make my way in the world?

Thank you
Will

Click to expand...

Sounds as if you don't need a damn thing.

As for the clinical depression, follow the advice of my dear departed dad-

Walk it off!

Join the SAS.

My life advice to you is not to seek life advice from people about whom you know absolutely nothing.

(But if you choose to anyway, I have some investment ideas I'd like to discuss with you . . .)

Read : "stumbling on happiness" by Daniel Gilbert. It can help .

Interesting post!

The most important thing financially is that nobody knows what will happen in the future: inflation, depression, stock market boom, crash, nobody knows. Don't put all your eggs in one basket; you won't make the big score but you won't get wiped out either. It's hard to have that discipline but in the long run nobody beats the casino.

Trends that seem certain get offset by adaptation; we used to worry that the Japanese economy would surpass the world; now they have been surpassed by the Chinese.

“Imagine throwing a pebble into a still pond. How does the water respond? The answer is, totally appropriate to the force and mass of the input; then it returns to calm. It doesn’t overreact or underreact.”

- Be like water…

Coming from a 24 year old that has had more than my share of failures in the past 3 years than ever before in my life: Don't let up. Be relentless in pursuit of your goals. And never take anything for granted.

Good on you for being so independent. Being able to do things for yourself is so important these days.

The Knize said:

<I suffer from clinical depression>

Stay on top of that one. True clinical depression can kill you just as surely as heart disease, and destroy those around you and you before it does. It is every bit as much a disease as heart disease, too. Don't let yourself convince yourself everything is okay, if it really is not. Let that loving woman be a mirror to you and trust what she reflects back!

Click to expand...

I agree 100&#37;. I suffer from depression as well and have been for over 20 years. Please make sure you have a medical professional looking after you in this regard and do not worry about the stigma. Your health and life is at stake. Feel free to PM me if you have any questions.

A very cool (and pertinent) article from the Chicago Tribune

Advice, like youth, probably just wasted on the young by Mary Schmich

If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be it. The long-term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists, whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering experience. I will dispense this advice now.

Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth. Oh, never mind. You will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they've faded. But trust me, in 20 years, you'll look back at photos of yourself and recall in a way you can't grasp now how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really looked. You are not as fat as you imagine.

Don't worry about the future. Or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubble gum. The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind, the kind that blindside you at 4 p.m. on some idle Tuesday.

Do one thing every day that scares you.

Sing.

Don't be reckless with other people's hearts. Don't put up with people who are reckless with yours.

Floss.

Don't waste your time on jealousy. Sometimes you're ahead, sometimes you're behind. The race is long and, in the end, it's only with yourself.

Remember compliments you receive. Forget the insults. If you succeed in doing this, tell me how.

Keep your old love letters. Throw away your old bank statements.

Stretch.

Don't feel guilty if you don't know what you want to do with your life. The most interesting people I know didn't know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives. Some of the most interesting 40-year-olds I know still don't.

Get plenty of calcium. Be kind to your knees. You'll miss them when they're gone.

Maybe you'll marry, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll have children, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll divorce at 40, maybe you'll dance the funky chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary. Whatever you do, don't congratulate yourself too much, or berate yourself either. Your choices are half chance. So are everybody else's.

Enjoy your body. Use it every way you can. Don't be afraid of it or of what other people think of it. It's the greatest instrument you'll ever own.

Dance, even if you have nowhere to do it but your living room.

Read the directions, even if you don't follow them.

Do not read beauty magazines. They will only make you feel ugly.

Get to know your parents. You never know when they'll be gone for good. Be nice to your siblings. They're your best link to your past and the people most likely to stick with you in the future.

Understand that friends come and go, but with a precious few you should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and lifestyle, because the older you get, the more you need the people who knew you when you were young.

Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard. Live in Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft. Travel.

Accept certain inalienable truths: Prices will rise. Politicians will philander. You, too, will get old. And when you do, you'll fantasize that when you were young, prices were reasonable, politicians were noble and children respected their elders.

Respect your elders.

Don't expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you have a trust fund. Maybe you'll have a wealthy spouse. But you never know when either one might run out.

Don't mess too much with your hair or by the time you're 40 it will look 85.

Be careful whose advice you buy, but be patient with those who supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia. Dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts and recycling it for more than it's worth.

But trust me on the sunscreen.

If someone hurts you emotionally, call it to their attention right away, but don't do it angrily. This will eventually help to ease your depression.

And why this intolerance of "mistakes"? An objective mistake might be leaving a cigarette on the bed and burning down the house! Most "mistakes" are entirely subjective to the one pointing them out.

As a fellow nineteen-year-old, you have a leg up on me!

Take 1 day at a time and try and remember that almost every mistake we make in life can be learned from and corrected. I've learned more from my mistakes than when something falls into place the first time. Life is not a race. The finish line is death itself. No need to sprint thru it all. Work hard and be true and honest to yourself and others.

Run for office.

The bigger the mistake, the heavier the lesson.