Would your rather....

itd have to be beetroot.
canned shaving gel (no brush) or shaving foam for a month?

gel (shudder)

no deaf for a month, or have to sit down for a month?

ooh, um, go deaf.
be able to play perfect piano or perfect guitar?

guitar (chicks dig it!)

have a tong or a spatula replace your left hand

good call. a tong.
go out with/date someone very ugly or very unintelligent?

ugly

be able to speak a little of 5 languages, or fluent in 1

if i could pick the language then fluent in one.
have to cry or laugh for one week solid?

laugh

wear a tuxedo or a safari suit every day for a year

tuxedo, but i wouldnt mind either
listen to your favourite song over and over for a month or never hear it again?

Listen it for a month. Would you rather give up your favorite meal if it meant you'd be in perfect shape forever or eat it and never be in shape?

Miss out on my favorite meal.

Since the holidays are here:

would you rather have a midget elf drive you around and get out to announce your arrival everywhere.

OR

have someone dressed as santa come into your office and tell everyone you've been naughty and show incriminating pictures of you to everyone.